Jo Permaul
How resilient are you exactly? How might you know if you need to build more resilience in to your world?
Resilience as a term is banded around especially in this post-covid world, often meaning needing to draw on our own inner resources, to get past obstacles and to have a steadfast quality to us that can handle whatever life throws our way. As a global community we have certainly had to adapt in the past 3 years to many changes, many new experiences, hardships, restrictions and been pushed both mentally and emotionally out of our comfort zone.
As the Director of a school that trains in resilience coaching I have to constantly check in with myself. You see, whilst I may know the theory, the reality of the situation is that resilience is a lifelong journey and one that we can all need some extra support on from time to time.
Take this recent journey that I’ve been on; from tutor at Wellness Professionals to Director and Owner, what a challenging but exciting path it’s been and as I reflect on how I’ve travelled, I can hand on heart say that the techniques we integrate into our coaching courses really are integral to my survival. I’d love to share those with you reader!
1 – Checking in with myself daily.
Self-reflection can be as simple as rating yourself out of 10 and asking yourself how might the day improve and what that might feel like? What might you need to do to get from a 3 to 6 out of 10 and what actions might you need to implement to get you there? For others of you, you might write a few lines on how you are actually feeling, or indeed use an emoji to rate your resilience that day.
2 – Delegating what I know I can’t do.
So we all have super-powers and zones of genius, but equally we all have areas in which we struggle, find challenging and in which we procrastinate because that stuff can feel boring, hard or unfulfilling. So what can you delegate to keep you in a positive mindset? Recently I delegated our website rebrand and that felt like a positive delegation. I also delegate SEO analysis, admin tasks and automations. It frees me up to do what I love, feel passionate about and that feels good (teaching, writing and coaching). What can you delegate?
3 – Working to my strengths. Looking at where we get it right is a great way to improve resilience. Sitting in the comfortable space of what we know we do well, but developing that knowledge and being in the company of those who share similar interests all boost my own personal and workplace resilience. I know my client-facing work is going well right now, so a quick check-in with clients really boosts both me and them, reminding me of why I am a good coach.
4 – Setting realistic SMART goals.
Specific, measurable, attainable, realistic and timebound goals really do ensure you get things done. So for example, I know that I want to make sure I keep on top of our social media marketing at WP@W, so have allocated a specific time each week to get that done. What do you need to set a goal for to help your own personal resilience? Who are you accountable to and if no-one then can you think of someone you’d like to share motivation with?
5 – Making time to do things just for pleasure and joy. Embracing our own sense of joy and capturing the small pleasures, taking time to consider what we have gratitude for enables us to welcome each day with enthusiasm. Last week after a heavy time uploading web text I walked my dog in the forest; what gave me joy that day was walking through stream with my wellies on, looking at the way the water ebbed and flowed against rocks and sticks that got in its path, taking me completely out of my head, grounding me and connecting me to nature.
6 – Listening to my body. As a health practitioner and holistic life coach I have learnt to recognise the signs of leaning in to understanding how my body responds when those intitial symptoms of feeling unwell reveal themselves. The tiredness, a sneeze or just being a bit snappier than usual, if left untreated can soon develop into a cough, cold or worse. The more we learn to hear what our bodies are actually trying to tell us the more we can respond with appropriate measures, self-care and this all aids our own wellbeing and resilience. What is your body trying to tell you right now?
7 – Integrating mindful approaches – considering how others might be feeling, looking at things from a different perspective, taking time to reflect before taking action, these are all mindful ways we can be proactive rather than leaping in reactively. Thoughtful consideration of how something might unfold ensures that we can approach things calmly. In my business I often ask myself, how might that feel for the student?
8 – Accepting limitations and being mindful of how much pressure I am putting on myself. This can be as straightforward as allowing myself to finish work every day by 5pm, or understanding as a woman that there might be different times of the month when my energy levels are higher or lower. Trying to meet deadlines when I have timed them at periods in which I have a lot going on in my personal life is not as conducive to resilience as thinking and planning my own diary according how I might be feeling.
9 – Catching my own limiting beliefs. As a middle aged woman, there is still at times a little girl in there screaming ‘I’m not good enough’ ‘I’m too shy’ or ‘they’ll think it’s a bad idea’, however as soon as one of those phrases even begins to rear its head, I’m in there with some CBC (Cognitive Behavioral Coaching) helping myself reframe those limiting beliefs. Let me tell you that putting out a new business, website and social media posts can feel exposing, vulnerable and raw at times, but once I establish that it is excitement not fear that is driving me I can enjoy these challenging moments and feel confident in my actions. That inner little girl feels confident again!
10 – Being part of a community to hold me. A group of people who share similar values, ideals, work ethic and point of view keeps me sane and in a high vibe! I belong to a women’s business support group, a short-term coaching group for changemakers as well as maintaining links with the coaching community and homeopathic community. I value my close friendships and make sure I check in with someone weekly for a catch up to help both theirs and my mental health!
How might you help someone with building Resilience?
You might like to consider our Certificate or Diploma course in Resilience Coaching. Or even our Integrated Diploma in Resilience and Wellness Coaching. If this sounds like something for you then why not book a discovery call with me to find out more. 2023 could be your most resilient year yet!
